Inspired by CJ Quines’s original blog post, which may or may not be a joke, hard to tell… Anyway, the following are real, I promise!

• “Tomer?” (this was the whole email)

• “Transform an unsexy industry!”

• “I totally get it 😂 these emails are super annoying, right?”

• “How are you?!”

• “Another technical recruiter here, trying to gas you and see if you’d like to discuss. Annoyed, non-plussed, or charmed? Lmk for research purposes…”

• “We also offer a referral bonus – we’ll treat you to any restaurant of your choice if you refer a person that we hire.”

• “Exactly the muscle and firepower we need! 🔥”

• “The engineering team remains embryonic.”

• “Your FP iterator library (lfi) shows the design taste we need for shopping AI that feels human.”

• “Me again 🙂”

• “I came across your details via some of your impressive open source projects like eslint-config.”

• “A career is like a frog in boiling water.”

• “Quick question: What’s the difference between debugging code and my follow-up game? One actually gets results 😅”

• “With this software, there’s no way in hell Ferris Bueller would’ve had so many days off.”

• “Yo yo yo!!”

• “Dropping some more heat 🔥…”

• “Trust me I don’t want to be a pest here, Tomer, but I’d be silly if I didn’t insist on getting your attention.”

• “This could be a legacy building role.” (yes, in bold)

• “if your still with me, you survived yet another recruiting email and fully expect you to delete this in the next second.”

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• “P.S. Here’s another attempt to make my emails more enjoyable: The glass is your inbox. The manatee is my email. Together they create the aforementioned bump!”